Monday, 23 February 2009

Visual thoughts

I used to be quite wary of sharing my thoughts and feelings about my faith. I suppose I thought people would laugh at me or tell me I had things all wrong. Since being ill I have become much more confident about my opinions and feelings, maybe because I now have so much time to think about them and be sure of them! Becoming a Quaker has definitely helped in this process. I know that fellow Friends will not make fun of the things I say. It's a safe feeling.

Sometimes when I am keeping silence, I have images or visual thoughts alongside the usual verbal ones. On one occasion, long before I began attending Quakers, I saw that I was walking hand-in-hand with Jesus, along a path near a wood. He turned to me and said, “'Friends walking together don't need to talk all the time; as long as they walk together, the silences don't matter.”

This was of enormous comfort to me, as my M.E. means that sometimes I can really struggle to find the words I need. It also formed an important part of my journey towards finding Quakers.

On another occasion, after I had been ill for some time, I was beginning to suffer from depression at my worsening condition. I saw a deep pit, full of shadows and darkness, and I realized that I was standing on Jesus, as if I were standing on a ledge. He said to me, “There is much further down you could go - but you won't.”

Since then I have never again felt so frightened and low, even though my physical condition has not improved.

These visual thoughts don't come often, but when they do, they stay with me for a long time afterwards.

2 comments:

RichardM said...

Whether what comes to us in worship is visual or verbal depends, I think, on one's personality. Louise Wilson is a very powerful minister who has had a profound effect on a lot of us in North Carolina and Louise's vocal ministry is usually of this visual kind. She will have these visions and relate them to us and they are quite striking.

So, I don't think your experience is at all unusual or odd.

Jan Lyn said...

This is an amazing piece here Heather. What a blessing to have visual thoughts/images and beautiful ones at that from the Spirit.

I know where else this needs to be heard........no pressure though.

Love you girl!
Jan Lyn